Direction

Sitting down to make a self reflective post on a Sunday night.
Lol.  Cant sleep after coffee.
My first cup of coffee bean with an old friend :D

_____________________________________________________________________

Working life is different. What do i really want? 

My fren asked me this question. 

I told him lol. I jz want someone to talk to. 

To listen to what i have to say and console me when im down.

Where i can say anything and just being myself without fear of being judged. 

To be there for me and accompany me when im bored.

He told me, i need a boyfriend.

I told him, no, i just need a friend. 

I mean it. But cant help but wonder, is he right? 

I dont want to find one just for the sake of having someone to be there for me.

Learning through consequences of finding job after feeling desperate to be employed.

I wont want to make the same mistake.

Life. So many definitions.

They say, we can choose what life we want to live.

Whether we want to pass every day happily or to be sad. 

But happiness and sadness, they are subject to influence by people around you.

Sometimes, really cant help but feel sad. Not that i want to feel this way.

But really cant help it. 

They say, its part and parcel of life. There are ups and downs.

And we grow through them. 

They make us strong.

What if i tell you, im not that strong after all?

I am afraid. I dont know what this world has to offer.

I cant see my future. I am going to spend the next tens of years this way? Omg

I am tired. This is life? 

You must be thinking, lol. I need to grow up. 

I am learning. I need some time.
Will working life change my personality?
Who will i become?
_____________________________________________________________________

As im writing this, Windows Media Player shuffled to Dreaming to you by Selena. 

Late at night when all the world is sleeping

I stay up and think of you. 

And i wished on a star

That somewhere you are, thinking of me too. 

August 26 2012 Hours 2336