Before 2011 Ends

I really want to say, time really flies

One year has passed really really quickly

I am not ready for the next year.

I know, we need to look forward and not looking back

But if i were given a choice

I would have wanted going back into the past

Not that i want to re-live the year

But i would have chosen to do things differently

____________________________________________________________________

Saw a lot of

One question.One chance.
One honest answer.
Before 2011 ends, you can ask me any ONE question and i'll answer it truthfully, no catch. ONLY one question.

(Inbox me) on fb

I thought of playing, but at last i decided not to.

Perhaps im really not ready to end 2011

Or perhaps i really have no answers.

I kept thinking, if 2012 is really the end of the world

Then i only have one year to achieve what i want

But then again, what do i really want?

I wanted too many things for myself.

You can say that im selfish. Perhaps i really am

A friend asked me today, where would you be at this time next year

I was a little taken aback. But i have no answer.

My dad asked me before, how come you can manage to book air tickets one year in advance but you dont know where you will be one year from now?

I just smiled

Because i have no answer again

Why am i always speechless? ZzZ

____________________________________________________________________

So what did i do in 2011?

I interned for six months

I extended a month of working with more pay

(2 weeks of hols and 2 weeks of playing--i bet they regretted extending my contract lol-but i told them in advance kayy)

One week of playing to a land not travelled Myanmar

Another week of playing to Lang Tengah snorkelling snorkelling and more snorkelling =)

Holidays to Hadyai and lost my cap there

Worked parttime for 3 months on and off and spent all my money no where

Break in August being maid of the house and meeting old friends--wonder where my sing k pictures ehem my dear fren lol

In August too, went to genting with my friends and entered the casino for the first time

But didnt know how to gamble, so we stood in front of the coffee machine for lunch break lol

Started sem 7 final year in Sept and met my coursemates whom most i have not met for a year approx

Exams, PD, FYP. Groupon, Trips for 14 weeks, and its the end of study week now

Time, flies. Happy New Year, next year i will graduate if nothing goes wrong lol,

goodbye to this phase of life, goodbye to the friends i know, and love

___________________________________________________________________

No more self reflection posts and emo posts for the rest of 2011

So let me end this post with a happy note as i got to eat something new in Serdang

Being here for 4 years ad and its only the first time i ate this paiseh

Fish head noodles lol *Pic stolen frm fb thankss yea =) *

Saw my fren posting this pic up and i started to crave it

Jz like how i craved popiah last Tues and ended up in pasar malam lol

Luckily its not far away

Thankss for bringing me and knowing where it is =)

Contented^^

I guess i need to explore Serdang more before i start exploring other places eg my colourful panmee to start with

Can it be considered as a new year resolution? =)

Good day for study week~ and happy new year^^

Goodbye to 2011, and hey, 2012, bring me more laughter and surprises♥

Luckily wont be spending new year's alone =)

Dec 30 2011 Hours 2052

p/s Kor, all the best in choosing pressie^^ And if u are free, plz feel free to get something for me too lol =)

Big Big Day Of Sem 7---) PD Day

Product Development day is a big day!

Becz its the end of misery for sem 7, if we dont count final exams =)

No more feeling of guilt for missing few sessions

No more feeling of frustrations waiting for missing people

No more tiredness of days of unproductivities

No more feeling of uncertainties

But this subject taught me a lot of things, about myself as i see clearer what sort of person i am

So many self-reflections these days

If i were to look at myself from another person's perspective,

I will admit that i wont be satisfied with how my personality is

But then, most decisions made are based on the situation at the moment

I did my best, i have few regrets. I hope you guys did too ♥

But at least, all the hard work paid off by winning rm 200 per group

But even if we didn win, i would have been satisfied

Because we did what we could as a commitment for this day.

No more rantings =)) Because i want to study ad lol

Let the pictures tell the story

Thankss pics from fb =))

Note to self: get new camera and new phone soon =.=

___________________________________________________________________

Our final product and booth decoration

Canned tempeh+chickpea+corn soup and oat-tempeh biscuits as dipping

The decoration of the booth because there's a prize for best booth decoration

Our board. We learnt from judges that--simplicity is the best. Should have known earlier :S

SoupXpert Crew group photo before the arrival of judges =)

While waiting for the opening ceremony of the day and announcement of winners

Other groups. Hmm should write, other companies =)

The Jackfi company of jackfruit floss from waste,

2nd prize winner and also the best packaging winner

The Dipcy company

Haricots Sdn Bhd with bumble beans

The winner Tebayo company of ice cream yogurt with tebaloi chocolate biscuits

I love their product! Ate lots lots lots thankss

Ate till i feel shy lol

Biskotti de Spinacia of La Spinasia Sdn Bhd

Multi Nutri Sdn Bhd with their ATP Bite

The pinky family of Integrali Sdn Bhd

Frozen confectionary Grainade

Drinkable tau fu fah of Leaflife Sdn Bhd

Pinkguava margerine of Urban Food Sdn Bhd

The Fibbie --love at first bite

Final group picture

After PD day, next we have to think about final exams and final year project

Spray drying from Tues till Friday the latest hope can settle as soon as possible T.T

Right now, loving the song Beverly Craven, Promise Me ♥

But i guess i shouldnt listen to it so often because it makes me emo omg

Back to Dancing In The Dark ♥

December 26 Hours 1018 Good Morning =)

Confessions of Christmas Eve

This topic is a little hard to blog about

But its the first thing i wanted to do ever since i woke up this morning

I slept thinking about it, i woke up still thinking about it

If i had energy to dream, i would have dreamt about it, all those bittersweet memories

But despite my motivations

I procrastinated till now

I opened a lot of pages,watched a lot of videos and read a lot of blogs before i came back to mine

And i wondered, if it is really that important to me to write this post

Cz i need to clear my brain before i can really study

I am not emotional. I just needed a break

And i thought, why not?

____________________________________________________________________

Lost games of dominos yesterday cz im too stupid

And questions kept flying

I wasnt prepared. I didnt even realise they knew.

It was awkward.

Not that im trying to avoid answering. I just didnt know how to answer.

They asked me, if i was hurt. I told them, no.

Actually i didnt answer them. I never exactly replied.

Because i cant remember what that feeling was like.

It felt as if i'm immobilized after so long.

When thoughts are left untouched for a long time

We tend to prefer keeping them in comfort zones inside the brain.

I dont know about you, but i do.

Its there, but its just a corner as a part of your life, collecting dust, but appreciably cherished.

Because i kept too many things to myself, i admit

I wasnt shy, I wasnt selfish, but I preferred to be in the background

And i wondered, why my personality is such

I am trying to change, but sometimes, things cant be changed

But the answer to the question: Its yes. If i were to say its 100% no, who am i fooling?

__________________________________________________________________

Feelings, this 8-letter-word, is an abstract

There is no right or wrong doings, no right or wrong feelings, i was taught years back

I used to acknowledge this. But then i thought,

If everyone is not responsible about their feelings, how will the world be?

I do not know how to elaborate, but since the person who taught me that is no longer friends with me or as perhaps forgotten me, i see no need to further explain because its not worth it.

The stories were long, but they were over.

There were times when i was waiting, but the times of disappointments were even more

Of cz, at times i was true. But thats no longer the issue.

Let them be memories cherished, and not burdens carried forward

Let the parts of confessions of Christmas eve, be safely left in the past of 24 Dec 2011 promise?

But anyway, thankss a lot for being there for me.

Appreciated, from the depths of my heart. I am sincere.

=)

___________________________________________________________________
2011 is going to pass, and i felt that this year really flew through

Looking back at fb timeline recently, i felt that i didnt do anything this year that has made me proud of myself and what i have done

I felt.. a little disappointed. I wasnt a good daughter. I wasnt a good sister. I wasnt a good friend

Slowly and slowly, i am beginning to feel myself changing

I dont know who i am changing to. I am scared. I dont know who i will be. Uncertainty.

And i wonder, what will 2012 bring?

Is it the end of the world?

If it is, i think i will die with regrets. Because i have not done what i wanted to do.

But then again, what is it that i want to do badly when my goals are badly defined?

So just pray hard, the world will not end too fast for you and for me =)

Plz god, give me a sense of satisfaction of living before taking me away

But right now, what i need badly is to go for a hair cut

Because in almost all my recent photos... undescribable... T.T

Study week is starting, happy studying to all of us =)

And happy spray drying to me .. hope all goes well and nothing explodes =)

God bless. Muakzz

Thankss for everything, i am learning to grow ♥

Ending this post with pictures from fb timeline throughout the 4 years

Similar people, different years-- generation pictures

But every year, there's one similarity-- which is that i look super stupid lol

First year =)) The aunty dress which i bought omg

2nd year.. i violated the black and white team by wearing red zzZ

Third year, i became super fat =.=

Fourth year, my face looks super round =.=

__________________________________________________________________

I admit, i am not pretty.

But love me for who i am, and not how i look can you? =)

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
=)

December 25 Hours 1736