If Only You Understand

This is the first time i'm writing a blogpost while crying infront of my lappie

I'm so glad my roommate is not it, at least i didn have to face her

I wanted to find someone to talk to, but i felt no one will understand, and i'm tired of explaining

To my surprise, i decided to write this blogpost,

So that just in case i were to die tmr, there will be someone who will know what i have been thinking

Life, so mysterious, with its complications.

Everyone expects us to understand theirs

But do they realise that we too have our own things to worry about

Everyone of us have our own stands, our own worries

Why does it have to change

Just because i dont have the need to it doesnt mean i dont love you

Just because i dont call it doesnt mean i dont miss you

I was hoping you will understand, or had understood

But i just realised you never did

Do you know i was down with fever and sore throat today and i spent my whole day sleeping

But all you did was just to give me a cold shoulder

I have enough stress of my own to handle

But you gave me more that i could handle

All these while i was hoping for your support

But i just realised you disappointed me just as much as i had disappointed you

I have nothing to say

I have an exam tmr, and you put me to bed with a headache and tears on my pillow

Sadly searching for panadol while i nursed myself to bed

Why does it have to be this way

December 3 2011 Hours 2122

And i stupidly thought december is my month

I am so naive

If you want, i will write a report card and email to you everyday?

Whats dropping from my eyes are not tears of sadness

More to tears of frustrations and disappointments on why you dont understand

What should i do

One question i want to ask

If both party cares, does it matter who calls who first when it has been the same way throughout the years?