Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Uncertainty

Life is .. full of uncertainties
Perhaps i should rephrase
I am full with uncertainty when i have many factors to consider
Sometimes, i wonder why i want to consider so many things
How nice will it be if i should just follow my heart and challenge myself
But i cant. 
The factors, are there and will always be there. 
Ignorance is not bliss. Ignorance is- hurting other ppl's feelings.
What i wanted- and what is in store in reality- is totally different
I cant say im a big dreamer, my expectations arent high
But still, at the end of the day, 
I dont know which road i should take.

Let me say what i wanted. Haha. Daydreaming is not a crime, isnt it?
I wanted a job with salary enough for me to have savings after car, hse installments, petrol, family, and for dining and shopping
Hopefully, the car wil be bigger and more stylish as i work. 
Most importantly- friendly colleagues and happy lifestyle
Overseas travelling! I love to see the world. But not alone, definitely
Stress is okay but not every day for 365 days
Working days of 5 days with time for me to relax and enjoy my weekends
Because we work for living, and enjoying life is part of living too :P

Most of the times, for the things i do, i dont like to explain the significance to other people.
Especially things that im unsure of, justifications make me suffocate 
Probably becz im unsure, therefore i duno how to make my stand
i dont know where im standing

How nice if i can just strike lottery tmr
And dont need to work for the rest of my life for the reason of survival
Working for pleasure- 
I believe this is the best you can dream of.

However, dreams remain dreams, and reality remains reality
There's a dimension between them,
Which will forever exist, no matter how closely related they may be.

Dilemma! 
Picture courtesy of Google Image :)
June 5 2012 Hours 2221



Friday, June 1, 2012

4 Years With Them

Dont know why, after coming back from gathering ystdy
I began to feel emotional. Fion's fault! Keep bringing us back into memory lane
But what she said was true. We were going to leave one another soon
Heading towards our own path. And even if we saw one another,
Things would never be the same again as we take diff paths.
Let me blog this post, from a view of a final year bachelor undergraduate
_____________________________________________________________________________
I rmb, the first day here, was a Sunday. I was super early bcz daddy and mummy were anxious lol
The first coursemate i met, i was told, was dailou. 
We were filling forms together but we didnt greet one another. Probably bcz i was arrogant. Or i was still getting used to the surrounding. I didnt rmb. All i cared about was.. another friend. Who no longer mattered.
And since i was early, i got a room at the first floor. haha. Happy
Becz i was lazy.. the hill was ad so high up. i was grateful not needing to climb up floors
My first roommate i met was Liyana. cz the other two were seniors who were still on sem break
Orientation week was depressing. I rmb i cried and cried. I felt so lost. I didnt know who i was and why i was there. I tried so hard to fit in. But i couldnt. Becz of language barrier? I didnt know
And without internet, i was even more depressed. I had no close friends. I saw everyone having their own coursemates roommates in which they could take classes together with. But i had no one.

And so we met our academic advisor. Haha. She told us that since our course code is 37, therefore we had to take classes of group 37. And so we searched high and low for class with code 37. And left isolated except for some classes which clashed, and the grp was changed secretly.
On the very first day of class, i wore a very formal shirt, and set out to take the bus alone.
 Asked someone for directions, and in one of the classes, physics, i met jaiboon and xinting.
I am so grateful for their presence and for treating me as a friend. Never got the chance to thank you. Thank you so much for being there when it matters the most
In Hubungan etnik, i met yuwen who was also alone in dr lee yok fee's class. haha. Secretly, i actually found his class interesting. And in kenegaraan, i met fion and weeting. I think there were more, but i couldnt rmb im sorry. At that time, we liked to go out in gangs. 
But later, we started to go separate ways. 

Oh yeah, and we had coursenight. First year coursenight in which we met our seniors. 
I met my direct senior and my super super direct senior. Thanks Ray for all the notes and being so kind. 
I rmb i had the most complete set of lab reports. Feel so grateful for your presence =) 
For first year coursenight, i rmb wearing a super super ugly dress. What made me buy it, lol
____________________________________________________________________
Perhaps there were more to first year but now for stories of second and third year..
Too many stories to tell but not today so decided to post pics
In no chronological order.. 
(Bcz im still not used to this new layout of blogger lol)
 In an unknown lab.. supposingly waiting for results haha- Xiyih, Me, Fion and Ah Fatt
And then we also went to Klang to find fish.. and went to Icity for the first time. Tq so much =) 

 And then we also went for MIFB 2010 where we ate and ate a lot 

With Fion after shopping xD

Sushi Member Day with Xinting, Jaiboon, Yenyi and Kuankuan
Haha my first time sushi.. but i was afraid of the raw food.. lol

With them =) 

haha.. H1N1 period outing

 Their October birthdays xD 

Replacement class break on a Sunday, 6 hours omg, lunch at mcd =)

 PAP 2010 =)

 Singapore 2010 during sem break - the three of us :)

Penang 2010 during sem break -the five of us :)
 Cant find a group photo so post two separate pics :) 

Pre moon cake festival steamboat dinner =) 

 syabu 1 steamboat =) I think it was then when i got the nickname- grey swan. omg. and nenek banana. haha. u geng xD
 My hair looks flat huh? haha. self-cut fringe zzZ
_____________________________________________________________________
Internship!

 Ipoh =)

 Penang =)

Myanmar lol

Lang Tengah =)
___________________________________________________________________
Final Year..
Many many many things changed and was never the same again
and there were many moments when i just felt like giving up
Especially when lab work was never ending and stress value was at the max
Thank you laukahyan! for sharing my worries and giving me hmm solutions lol
and thanks friends for those Rm300++ gatherings haha money is well spent because i treasure every moment spend with all of you
Pray hard for viva now that seminar's over, god bless.

Pictures say a thousand words :P Sorry for the bad resolution though, cz i am lazy to search my messy harddisk so decided to import pics frm fb public pics :) 
 My direct senior's graduation =)

Xinting's ROM =)

 Kuala Selangor,  Klang, Taman Pertanian Smile Laugh Laugh Trip

My birthday =)

Thanks so much =) Muakzz

Clubbing after coursenight =) when can we go again? xD 

 Life with Groupon =)
 US Ranger =)

PD Day! Wow

Christmas Party afterwards =) 

DCZ =) 

Genting Doraemon World =)

 Putrajaya =)

Pulau Ketam and Bukit Tinggi =)

Melaka! xD

Bali xD

Lunch Buffet at Crystal Crown =)

F4 with bubbles xD

Kite xD

FNS Gathering xD 

Their early birthday celebration ♥
_____________________________________________________________________
.. and countless more
and i.never thought i wil feel this way
and if i ever go away
Just close your eyes and try to feel the way we do today
and then if you can remember..
Keep smiling, keep shining, knowing you can always count on me, for sure.
Thats what friends are for. Love you all.
June 1 2012 Hours 1335

p/s To a friend: if you have something to ask me, please do because when we leave this year, we wont be coming back. And when we do, it will be a different story altogether~

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Complicated May

Lately i have been very much into horoscopes despite all those hectic schedules
Becz i realised i am beginning to lose focus
And i need a clear understanding on something before i continue thinking of what i want
Before continuing with any other horoscopes, of cz i read mine
The traditional sagittarius traits (googled) include:
Optimistic and freedom loving
Jovial and good humored
Honest and straightforward
Intellectual and philosophical
Blindly optimistic and careless
Irresponsible and superficial
Tactless and restless
I agree, 
especially on the tactless and restless part..
Dont know why so emo lately
Thinking of things that i shouldnt be thinking about
Maybe im over sensitive, but 
Doesnt sensitivity means you care over something?
When care is there, its hard to just let it be and say goodbye when small details matter
I may act as if i dont care but i dont know why, i do.
So im trying to find my answers but i cant seem to find them.
How pathetic. Really pathetic 
Fyp is giving me headache headache and headache bcz i duno what is wanted
Maybe its right that they say im irresponsible
Because i really dont have much energy left to settle it
But rather just to hope for the best of all
____________________________________________________________________
Today went for lunch buffet with them at Crystal Crown Hotel
RM23 for buffet and we ate till we dropped
So many cakes and desserts, taste wise is better than SGarden but the atmosphere in SG is better
After that went to MRR2 for layang-layang xD
This plan was abandoned since months back and i was excited we went
Initially we only brought 1 kite but we came back with three

 Its a bird! Its a plane! But its not superman.. haha
The bird belonged to Ivan and the green jet plane belonged to Shin
The minute when he brought his plane back we were laughing and laughing
Cz we guessed the aunty seller must be glad that the plane was finally sold off
The funnier part came when they wanted to send those kites for their maiden flights
They just can't seem to fly. and they were telling shin that he's now bz 'fong-fei-kei-ing' lol 
Its the first time that i play kites while wearing a dinner dress
Never felt so carefree since so long ago. 
Thanks guys for the memories ^^ and thanks Shin for sending me home
May 26 2012 Hours 2303
Its time to sleep.
 Dont haunt me with bad dreams. I just need a rest.
Because i need to fight, a long battle

Suddenly lunch with Sotong on the 9th, something to look forward to :)

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