Why

Suddenly i have mood to post this. Why do i start a new blog?

I wont say i had planned this for a long time. It actually came to me.

Actually its just me binding myself. Maybe a part of me was hoping for a miracle, but i know it wont.

There's no point hanging on. But hey. not that i want to start a new blog everytime i..

Pity my frens too. Sorry ya.

Its just that there are too many memories in the old blog that i want to put aside.

Maybe forgiven. but not forgotten. I ask myself, why not try putting that down?

I will feel lighter. I did. Maybe not entirely, but perhaps time cn tell. Time can heal. Time can change.

Today, my fren suddenly told me i'm naive. I have to confess, i was surprised. I fought back, i told him what i told him was not due to naive-ness. Its due to trust.

But as i thought deeper, maybe he was right. I was too protected from the harshness of this world. Thats why its so easy to hurt me. Thats why i ended up in this predicament.

I will learn to grow up. Facing the world is not easy. But i must. I have to.

Tonight, i thought back of many things. Things that seemed so important to me previously, seemed so childish now.

Maybe its a process of growing up, but its also a process of me getting more hard.My heart was not the same like how it used to be

I wont say its due to you. Its not your fault entirely. Its just me. I am in the process of learning how to protect myself. Mentally, emotionally.


Sunset. Sunset represents the end of the day, but there's still hope as the sun will rise again tmr.

I have seen many sunsets, but its only now that i get its significance.

I am not waiting for hope anymore, i am waiting for something bigger.

I am waiting for myself. To learn to be stronger. To be more mature. Instead of who others perceive me as.

I wont be afraid anymore. I have to be tough. Its not a choice i have anymore.

Hope doesnt come from the surroundings, from what others give you.

Hope comes from your inner self, if you think there's hope, all may not be lost, yet.

But sometimes, of cz, sensibility comes. When there's really no way through, just let it be instead of holding on to it.

You will only hurt yourself. Like i did.

Looking beyond the horizon may not be a bad choice after all.

Giving myself a change, giving myself another chance, giving myself another life.

The world is so big. There's so many things i haven seen, so many things i haven done, so many people i haven met.

Of cz, i still treasure those around me. You guys really meant the world.

Without you all, I'm nothing. I still appreciate. No worries, i'm still the same old me.

I'm just trying to be a new improved formula while still retaining the same old me.

Thoughts of a food technogists. Haha. But yea, i'm serious.

Hours 0150, 23 June 2010

About starting this blog, i welcome feedback but plz do not ask me any questions.

Because what i write are mostly thoughts and not factual with references, once the thought had passed, perhaps it had really passed.

There are no right or wrong thoughts, whether you agree with me or not, its beyond my control.

Perhaps its selfish of me to think this way, I am sorry. Perhaps i am like that.

Justifications, to me, are not as important. Because if you understand, you will. And if you do not, if you were meant to understand, in time, you will understand sooner or later.

Dont be curious, because curiosity kill the cat. Watch Nickelodeon. Haha

p.s. Time to sleep. Working again tmr. Dont say i'm tired. Think positive! I urge myself.

But is it that easy?

No matter what, i will try. Promise myself.